Marriage

Making Marriage Work When You Both Work From Home

My husband and I recently moved to Mississippi into our dream place. A log cabin, 20 acres of land, in the country and in a fabulous community. We had originally planned to stay traveling full-time for a bit longer, but God opened the door for us and, after several hurdles, we find ourself here – in the place of our dreams.

We started looking for a home with no idea where or how quick we would find it. With both of us working from home, we could literally go online and draw a huge circle across 6 states and just look at all of our options. And, that’s exactly what we did. We logged into the Zillow app daily, drew our circle and looked to see what was for sale, or had just come up for sale. After a few days of searching we found our house – our dream house.

We have since moved in and settled down, but not without some hiccups. As with any move, unexpected things come up and you have to figure out a new routine. For us, finding a new routine with how we both worked was the most difficult.

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While we were traveling, our schedule was all over the place. We worked when we could, and that often meant late into the night, during the weekends and even on holidays. We knew that when we moved into a house and settled, we would be changing that, for our own sanity, to normal business hours.

But, going from working at all times of the day to abiding by business hours became more difficult than we had anticipated. We were still moving into the house, things had to be cleaned, built and put away…all while I tried run a business and Alan taught his online classes. Over the next few weeks, we really had to figure out HOW we were going to make it work with us both working from home.

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  1. We set hours. This is the most obvious, but we are doing everything we can to set hours, let our clients know our hours, and take the weekends (especially Sunday’s) off. This allows us more time to be with each other, know when we can make plans and actually have lives outside of work.

2. We understand that we both have a job to do. If it’s 1pm and I decide I want to take a break, I know that I may not be able to ask Alan for help right then and there. By taking a breather and realizing that he’s working (during regular work hours), it reduces stress and strain with me needing him to do something right then and there.

3. We don’t let work bog us down. This is a really tough one, especially for me. I have a habit of just talking and talking so, if I have a bad day at work, I want to talk about it forever. I have to make a conscious choice to not talk about work, not let whatever bad things happened during the day bog me down and let it go. Tomorrow is, after all, another day.

4. Make sure we’re doing the best we can at work. I bend over backwards for my clients, as Alan does for his students. We both work REALLY hard and I believe this has attributed much to the success of being able to both work at home. By doing the best we can, we are stressed out less because we are performing well at the job set before us.

5. We remember that God is always in control of everything. Working for yourself (or even just working from home) gives us a tremendous sense of freedom. Unfortunately, that freedom also often brings along a complex that we are in control of everything. Sure, we can control how well we perform, when and how work gets done, but we have no control over our business in the long run. Ultimately- that is up to God.

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We have been blessed, far more than we deserve. Now in our second year of marriage, we had absolutely no idea we’d both be working from home and living in our dream home so soon – but, here we are. It doesn’t matter if you both work from home, or if you both work out of the home- it can come with challenges but, if you remember to value and cherish your marriage first, balancing work and life doesn’t have to be difficult. Sure, there will be some hiccups along the way, but that’s life. We all have to find what works for us in the situation we are in. So, how are you balancing work and marriage?

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